i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
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