she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
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