apparently the secret to your success is patron
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
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