he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize
