Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
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