A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
Randomize
