No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
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