She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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