I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize