do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize
