don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
How does it feel to date your dad?
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
