he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Jerry, you need to find god
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
