Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
Randomize
