I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
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