just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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