Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Randomize