Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Randomize