ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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