I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
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