garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
