Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Randomize
