i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
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