I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize