Where did you get a picture of my penis
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
3 2 1 whiskey
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
Randomize