What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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