If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
he thought i was a dude.
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Randomize
