So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
