He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize