Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Randomize
