How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
