okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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