Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
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