see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
