Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Randomize