he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
Randomize
