think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
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