She is in my trunk
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
