I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
being pregnant is like rehab
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
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