Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
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