It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We left the knife in your bed.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize