"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
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