can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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