I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
