hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
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