i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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