How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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