Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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