Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
