Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
Randomize
