The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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